The Bees Game

Oh my, it was the Highlight of my week! I was really happy I was able to go. Brady called me up on friday night and asked me if I could go, and at first I had to tell him no because I was supposed to pick my parents up at the airport on Saturday night. Well I called up my mom and asked if I could go, and she said yes. So I called Brady back and we ended up going. BAhhahahahaha those little things they call "thunder sticks" that make the loud noise when you bang them together- well brady and I should not be allowed to have those. We didn't stop hitting each other All night long. Haha the people around us were getting pretty annoyed but we obviously didn't care. Then again, I don't care what people think at all. I think I won the battle though, Brady kinda slacked off a little bit. Though when I kept smacking him in the face, he ended up Wet wiping me...........ugggghhh it was disgusting haha. We tried getting Dip n' Dots for free..that didn't work out too well, but boy were they good. Oh, we also had free dinner. It was nice haha. So thanks for last night Brady, I had a blast!!! PS----We should go to Bear lake the weekend of the 12th and 13th hahaha .
Anyway, My parents got home from Cali last night, they had an amazing time and I did miss them. They bought me a Dodgers sweatshirt and all this Peace stuff etc. It's pretty tight, I am glad to have them home though.
I havn't seen much of Kristin this week, and now she starts school...hmm. I don't like it. I miss her, and I have something for her, but since she's starting school tomorrow I'm not sure how often I'll actually get to see her. :(
Rosie- I hope you had a good birthday baby!! And I do hope to hear all about NY one day. Love you!
Ali and Mckenzie- Expect a visit from me and possibly Kristin sometime soooon , we both miss you sooooooo much!!! We need to see your darling faces! Love you girls!
Jocelyn baby girl- where are you!?!?! It's been like a month since I've seen you and that's not acceptable! Call me love because I miss your face!!!
Anyway, that's the highlight of my weekend. It was..a pretty uneventful week besides I was at the IHC for who knows how long becaues I had a Major ear ache. I cried pretty much all day. Oh well, it's all better now!
Love you all! Peace

This crazy feeling

is coming over me. The other day at a certain event, I was hanging out with my friends and I had this feeling of jealousy? As I sit there and tell everybody "I don't", I think I do. I'm not ready to admit what it is, sooner or later I will. I just need to double check if this feeling is true or not. It's crazy, I absolutly love this feeling but I'm afraid of the outcome of it. I guess we'll just see what happens! These past few weeks have been nothing but Hell for me. There has only been a few people who have been able to put a smile on my face, make me laugh and finally be happy! Finally, since monday night, I've pushed aside my feelings and have been myself. Ahh how I've missed it. Yes I've still had my breakdowns and the feeling of my stomach falling out of my butt, but it hasn't nearly been as bad as it was. I said goodbye to one, I don't regret it. The only sad part about it, that one hasn't cared at all. I guess that's the choice it chose. As for Scott, well I've just decided that apparently his life is better without me in it, and mine without him. I'm getting over him and I can't WAIT for the day that I can call him and say "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you!"

So Brady made me this new CD, oh my gosh, best CD ever!! It consists of the Jo Bros, The Spill Canvas, Miley Cyrus, Motion city Soundtrack, Toby Keith and alot more!! It also has pictures on it of me and Brady! They're soooo cute! He's my best guy friend and I wouldn't trade him for the world! He has done so much for me lately, I wish that there was a way that I could repay him back for it, but if I did, it would take me a very long time! All I can say is Thanks for everything you've done for me Brady, You're my best friend, and I love you with all my heart!

It's weird to think that everybody is.....gone? All of our friends who are going to college somewhere that's not in SLC has moved on. It's strange not to be with our friends, all of them. I miss alot of them alright such as Kenz and Ali! Ps- Kenzie and Ali, Kristin and I will be coming to visit you very very soon, so make room for us! haha and Ali, I hope you're feeling better hun!

So today at work, I smashed my fingers in a metal cubbard. It did not feel good and my finger is all swollen and bloody and nasty and I can't move it. I started crying and I felt pathetic because there were memebers outside waiting for me to help them and I couldn't because I was crying and I had blood running down my fingers. It's feeling a little better now- thank goodness!
Well I'm off to listen to my CD some more and possibly eat food? hahahaha Peace!

Saying goodbye

Is what I need to do. Is what I am going to do. I got sick to my stomach just thinking about it earlier and had a panic attack. I didn't end up doing it. I thought I wouldn't be myself after I've said it. In the next few minutes, I will be saying goodbye to one. It's something I need to do. It won't be easy that's for sure, but hopefully it will make things a little better. Who knows how long it will be before I return, could be months......or possibly never. You probably have alot of questions, but to be honest, I can't answer them. I don't know where I'll be going, I don't know who I'll actually talk to, I don't know where life will take me in these next few days. But I know goodbye is the right thing for me to say right now. You may not understand, only a few of you do. I feel like my stomach is going to fall out of my butt just thinking about it. Ugh what's wrong with me?! I don't know, nobody knows. I need to .....fix my emotions and get my head screwed back on. I shouldn't have any tears left to cry, but they keep coming out like waterfalls down my face, into my hands, into my shirt, on my pillow case, on my friends shoulders. I love you all......and Goodbye.